I have to move all of my old blogs to here 1

Entry for January 21, 2007-diary from my old diary
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
I Quit
Finally, I quit the job. The frist time I quit a job. Quit a temp job , sounds too funny.
The frist time I cry in front of the class. Never did that even students are aggressive, mostly I can take it easy. This time I can't.
School used a week to see I can work there well or not. I used one more week to try to adapt there also. Some students are nice and good. I really enjoy to be class teacher of a class P3. But I can't eat work, can't sleep well these two weeks. I woke suddenly and shaking hard before the time I should get up. I don't want to go school. Keep tears around eyes. Never being crazy like that. I feel so depressed. That's awful. I love teaching. But I can't work well there. I feel sorry to some of the students.
I told the headmaster that I got some personal problems to handle, so I can't teach there anymore. She tried to persaude me to stay. Also give me an offer that as I can solve those problem frist and back to teach after a week (then still can teach there two weeks). But I still say no. I even don't want to step in there anymore. I terrified that place. A friend said that I surrendered to kids. I admit that. They won this time. I feel so frustrative. But sure I won't tell the headmaster that I think your school is very horrible. I just say 'personal problem' , didn't say what is it only. Also I can't stop tears dropping down after the 4th lesson. I really don't want my emotion disturb my students. That's not good to them.
Quited! Cried a lot. Mum doesn't mind I quit. Thanks her so support and understand me. When Dad knows I don't need to work today, Mum just said 'yup'. Don't explain anything. She is cool. Also when I told my friends about that. They didn't think I quit like a spoiled kids. I really glad.
Mummy, I love you so much.
12:16 PM
Tuesday, May 04, 2004
I hate Someone
All of my friends know that I am nice and patient enough. I seldom feel hate someone or want to beat up someone. Even I said that sometimes but always not really mean that.
When I ignore someone like invisible. You will know I really hate him/her a lot. The guy I want to beat up now. Saw him at school everyday. I just want to kick his ass when he walking down stairs. hahahahaa........Just think about that is fun. You guys must think I'm prevert. I think I'm insane only.
I sick of someone like playing tricks at school. School is a place for learning. Students are not chesses. How can someone so bad that try to step me down in front of my class and fool my students also?! He is a teacher?! That's sh#t! If he tries to do anything bad to my class or me again, I must fight back. As I just a substitute teacher. I don't care to pick my bag and leave but no way to let him play such kind of dirty tricks.
8:53 AM
Sunday, May 02, 2004
Lucky Day
Even sleepy, still got up to meet Jessie . We went to IFC see 'Mona Lisa Smile' this morning. 10:10am , that's deadly early for me. ZZzzzzzzz......
Before the movie start. There has a lucky draw to celebrate a new start cinema in Cyber Port. I can't believe that I'm one of the lucky people to get 4 free movies tickets. hahahhaa............YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm not the kind of people always can win something at lucky draw. How lucky I am today?!
The movie is really great. I feel more touching maybe because I'm a teacher also. We all hope can help students find their road /their career. We hope they don't regret, we hope they don't make too much or too serious mistake. But how about us? We really find our way to go? I doubt it. Just like Julia Roberts in the movie, She tried to help students to find they road, but actually she needs help also. She is also seeking her road. And me too. Be a teacher is my dream job since primary. I enjoy teaching. But also because I don't want to step out school. I think school is place very peace and easy to survive. But worked two years, I know that's not easy to survive everywhere. Up to now, no interview, no long term post, still keep going or change work field? This is a question in my mind for a week already.
Back to work tomorrow. I hope I can get rid the feeling that I want to quit. sigh........
9:37 AM
Saturday, May 01, 2004
Sleepy Day zzzzz
I get up at 6:00am everyday. Weekend fianlly! Why you so crude, Carmen?! Forgot we have a lesson today and she went to drink tea in Tuen Mon. I got up at 9:00am today because have a lesson to her.
I'm deadly nervous about Carmen's HKCEE. I taught her 5 years. After her exam, I will not be her private tutor anymore. I got a bit upset about that. Those students I teach long. They are my friends also like younger sisters. Every summer holidays , I arrange activites to go with them. Actually give both a chance to play and out of study.lol
Marking and marking students excerises. I finally surrender to my job. I need to take excerises back home to mark. Even I really don't want to take work to home now. But still pick two rolls of worksheet back. My desk already covered by many many many excerises book. No matter how hard I mark them, new work is coming the next day. Monday soon....HELP........
My class will have an evalution on Tuesday. That's something nervous me. As I know if they don't have good result, the orginal teacher will have trouble. Even I just taught them a few days up to now, they are really great kids. But I have 2 evils classes, give me a few angels really fair enough. I hope I can insist to finish the teaching there. I really think about to quit. And now I really afraid I get into some power fight, that's something I really don't want. Kids are naughty, that's something I don't mind even I feel frustrative sometimes. But I know my responsiblies are teaching them be good. I just would be there a month, don't make some trouble stuffs to me.
I still want to say 'I HATE TWO OF MY CO-WORKERS. I WANT TO BEAT THEM UP ALSO STRANGLE THEM!'
Now is time to sleep. I will see 'Mona Lisa Smile' next morning. hehehehhee
2:24 PM
Friday, April 30, 2004
Italian Dinner
Friday night! Finally finish a week crazy work. This week is so hard for me . I met Jessie to have dinner in Soho. lol. New place we like to go now. We will bankrupt soon. hahahaha........
The dinner was nice. Lobster angel hair and a snake for share with delicious chocolate dessert. Yummy Yummy.
Also a guy stared us. hahaha.........I know he stared me for long. hahaha....He keep smiling when he walk pass our table. lol. But I keep talking with Jessie for sure. I'm shy. hahahhaa.........Jessie will complain that maybe that guy actually staring her. I should say that he stared US (be fair) lol
As the italian resturant crowded with people. We decided to go. And a group of guys just blocked our way. Jessie sweetly to say 'excuse me', all guys yelling 'sorry'. Funny boys. But we are on the way home already. lol Jessie and me both think guys there are cool tonight. hahahaha........sounds like we go hunting, lol.
Beside, one of the waitesses there is cute also. Plus the guy stared us is manager there (I guess)
PS. Jessie wants to take a pic with that guy, but at last didn't. hahahhaa.........